More black women dating outside race

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By the way, lacrosse and soul train are stand-ins for whatever that means for you and your would be Chad.

Lacrosse could equal skiing, windsurfing or flip-flops. As long as you’re both willing to learn and share then you both get something out of it.

Soul train could mean double dutch, spades or sending food back unapologetically. You don’t have to become an avid hiker or wear Teva’s (yikes, please don’t) just because he does. You should at least politely taste everything someone gives you — you know that already, don’t act like your momma didn’t raise you right.

But I say, be open to trying new things at least once. At family events his Mom, cousin, Aunt (pronounced “Ant” for some reason) etc may bust out a white version of a dish that your family makes and you know by the looks of it that it’s not going to taste the same as (read: as good as) your family’s. Will you be subjected to a lifetime of mediocre, under seasoned, undercooked, collard greens? Don’t make a stink eye about it if you don’t like it.

Honestly, move over Serena Williams, because you’re in town now!

Whatever the reason, it doesn’t matter to me why you’re reading this article. I’m black, my man is white and we’ve been together for over six years.

If you want to, of course, you don’t have to tell him all of our secrets). You may have noticed that the average white dude does not flirt/kick game/holla at a woman in the same way that the average black dude does. He kept calling it “hanging out.” And on these “dates” he didn’t say anything about my body, whether he liked it or what he wanted to do with it — you know standard black dude cues for “I have a romantic interest in you.”White men are super subtle. Because if Chad is shy, and a lot of white dudes are shy, he may get defensive or skittish and say, “No, no, we’re just hanging out.” And that would kill the vibe. If the answer to most or all of these is yes, it may be a date.

White men generally flirt in the same way that they conduct business meetings. That’s why I say you may already be dating one because you may have misconstrued the seemingly platonic hangouts you’ve been having with Chad as non romantic, but to him, it’s a date. You may be tempted to be direct and flat out ask him, “Hey Chad, is this a date? Sensitive white dudes scare easily so tread lightly. I wouldn’t get thrown off by whether he makes a move on the first few of these “dates.” Like I said, they can be subtle and shy and slooooow, so give it some time.

The stuff that he’s culturally grown up being into that you’ve never heard of or know nothing about and vice versa?

Or you could communicate, “Oh, you put raisins in your potato salad, we don’t make it that way in my family is there a reason you do that?

” I believe interracial relationships are a chance for learning and sharing.

At that point, move on to the next Chad or take the direct approach and ask him directly if he likes you, at that point you have nothing to lose.

So by past I mean either, he’s never dated a black girl before and he knows nothing about us or he’s only dated black girls and is obsessed with us. If he’s a total newbie, I think it’s ok if he learns on the job.

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